The Blessing of Friends

Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.

-ANAis NIN
Angels aren't our only constant reminders of Divinity's devotion to our emotional, physical, and psychological well-being. So are our friends.

Angels bestow grace and perform miracles; so do our friends. Angels are Divine messengers; so are friends.

God speaks to us through all those inti­mate chats, conversations, and confessions. Probably because, if we'll listen to anyone it's to a pal who loves us unconditionally and is committed to our happiness.

Our friends are the jewels in our crown of contentment. We need to treat them as preciously as we truly hold them in our hearts. There are many ways to do this. Rituals of friendship are especially meaningful. Take each other out for festive birthday lunches.

Share your favorite books. Read one simultaneously, then get together once a month for afternoon tea or cof­fee just to discuss it.

Be on the lookout for newspaper and magazine articles, recipes, and cartoons you can clip or photocopy and drop them in the mail. Remember friends with cards and thank-you notes.

Brief, encouraging notes when tough times hit will be treasured, even more than phone calls. Share res­olutions or aspirations with a friend on New Year's Eve. Go on walks togeth­er. Make annual outings a tradition: antiquing, flea marketing, or thrifting together in the summer; holiday shopping together in the winter.

Once a year, have a swap meet of clothes and accessories. When a friend's sick, deliver a get-well "indulgence basket" filled with bedside comforts: something irre­sistible to read, cough drops, tissues, assorted fruit teas, homemade soup, a small, flowering plant.

Send or give friends flowers: spur-of-the-moment bou­quets from a street vendor before you meet for lunch or  to bring a smile dur­ing dark days.

When there's a death in a friend's family, instead of making a contribution in the deceased's name or sending flowers to the funeral (others will do that), wait a couple of days and send her a beautiful plant or bouquet.

It will comfort her more than you can imagine. During tough times, put her name on a prayer list.

Sometimes our prayers for our friends are the greatest gifts we can give them. Start or continue collections for a friend, adding a new collectible each birthday or at holiday time.

When giving a cherished pal a gift, always give her something she'd never give herself, an indulgence. Cook for your friends.

During trying times-while a friend is sick or under tremen­dous stress-double a recipe and deliver a casserole to her home.

Above all, let your friends know how much you love them. Tell them fre­quently how much you treasure the gift of their friendship.

Sadly, signifi­cant others come and go. Children grow up. Parents die. Siblings are sepa­rated by distance.

But our friends are the continuous threads that help hold our lives together. Cherish your friends, not only in thought but in action. "friends are people who help you be more yourself," Merle Shain reminds us, "more the person you are intended to be."