Why Self-Confidence Can't Be Bought but Can Be Borrowed

By Sarah Ban Breathnach

I was thought to be' stuck up." I wasn't. I was just sure I'm myself. This is and always has been an unforgivable quality to the unsure. -BETTE DAVIS

It would be wonderful if we could simply waltz up to a cosmetic counter and purchase a bottle of  self-confidence the way we can buy "revitalizing" or "performance" creams for our faces.

Unfortunately this spiritual elixir, like an expensive perfume, is different on every person because of individ­ual chemistry.

When I was younger, my self-confidence potion was heavily scented with attitude, optimism, and faith; experience, knowledge, and wisdom had to come later. But even today, every new opportunity or challenge requires that I prepare a special batch of moxie for myself.

I do this by becoming as thoroughly prepared as possible and by looking the part­-wearing an outfit, for example, that exudes self-confidence even when it's hanging in the closet. Next I say my prayers and ask for the Power to be switched on. Then "it's showtime." I act as if I'm self-confident and the world takes me as such.

When you're unsure of yourself but life requires you to be otherwise, it is comforting to remember that you can always borrow a self-confident attitude from your authentic self. She knows how terrific you are and can give you that little boost, which is all you really need.

Our subconscious mind cannot distinguish between what's real and what's imaginary (which is why creative visualization works). If we act as if we're confident, we become so. At least for a little while.

"You must do the thing you think you cannot do," Eleanor Roosevelt once observed, and her life was spent prov­ing the point. When life challenges arise, you can surmount them by call­ing on Spirit and borrowing the scent of self-confidence from your authen­tic self.

Source: Simple Abundance - A Daybook of Comfort & Joy